Synopsis
(Character 'FLESHCREEP' won a NODA Award for Best Comedy Performance 2016)
Dame Tilly Trott is the proprietor of “Tilly Trott’s Circus”, but times are hard. Giant Blunderbore and his horrible wife insist on sending their henchman, Fleshcreep (played on his knees), to the village of ‘Much Piddling in the Marsh’ to collect the taxes and do their dirty work. Jack Trott has to sell Buttercup the Cow so the family can make ends meet. Simple Simon provides the laughs and Jill Crumble provides the love, but how will the family survive?
CHARACTER LIST
GIANT BLUNDERBORE Baddie
VEGETABLE FAIRY Lettuce the immortal fairy
DAME TILLY TROTT Panto Dame, circus proprietor
SIMPLE SIMON Silly son of Dame Trott
JACK TROTT Hero son of Dame Trott
JILL CRUMBLE Girl friend of Jack Trott
MRS BLUNDERBORE Giants horrible wife
FLESHCREEP Giants henchman, played on knees
OTHERS Villagers, Servants of the Giant
SAMPLE TEXT...
DAME TROTT Ok, maybe you’ve got a point. Anyway, I’ll need more time to get to know XXXX. Hi XXXX (waves and winks at man). Hold on, do you mean to tell me, that all these mums and dads, and boys and girls missed our AMAZING circus acts?
SIMPLE SIMON Mum, we haven’t got any amazing circus acts!
DAME TROTT Shut up Simple Simon
SIMPLE SIMON We are the only circus that hasn’t even got any animals!
DAME TROTT No animals! Wash your mouth out Simple Simon, what about Buttercup the cow?
SIMPLE SIMON Mum, Buttercup the cow isn’t in the circus!
DAME TROTT Buttercup may not be in the circus but she does give us our milk! Where would we be without her?
SIMPLE SIMON In Asda, buying milk like everyone else
DAME TROTT Since the Giant keeps putting the taxes up, I’ve got a little behind!
SIMPLE SIMON Who are you trying to kid!!
DAME TROTT We’ve had to cut back! We can’t afford anything anymore..(encourage a reaction from the audience) No, it’s worse than that.. (encourage audience even more) The only thing I’ve managed to keep is my big top! (adjust bosom) I thought you’d notice that XXXX
SIMPLE SIMON Mum, I even heard today that Peter Small the Human Cannonball has left the circus too
DAME TROTT Oh no, I’ll never find another man of his calibre!! (looks at audience for reaction to joke) The jokes don’t get any better you know!
SIMPLE SIMON You remember what happened to Nellie the Elephant!
DAME TROTT Yes, Nellie the Elephant packed her trunk and said goodbye the circus...
SIMPLE SIMON Then off she went with a trumpety-trump (encourage the audience) Trump trump trump!
DAME TROTT Even the bearded lady went to sing at Eurovision! Oh Simon, what are we going to do. The Giant is going to want the taxes any day now
SIMPLE SIMON It’s ok mum, I’ve got an idea
DAME TROTT That’s what I’m afraid of!!!
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